Sinsemilla

By Bill Gallagher
1310 Words


     The first time I smoked real potent pot was by accident, involving a lot of chance circumstance and even serendipity.  It was 1977, and I was getting ready to graduate from Miramar High School, in South Broward County Florida.  I was also dating the girl who was to be my future first wife.  We were a bunch of wild kids from privileged families, which is to say we were normal for that time and place.  We lived in very exotic setting, with a lot of excellent weather and plenty of easy, well paying work.  It was fun.
     Most of the pot we high school kids got was brown mexican, heavily seeded, lots o' stems, but we didn't know much then, and usually smoked the stems too.  Our few experiments with smoking seeds were always ill fated and therefore short lived, though we had by that time all begun experimenting with planting those seeds, which would lead to a lifelong passion for some of us.  Along with the brown Mexican we sometimes got Jamaican black, and also some reds and golds from the places in Mexico where they really know how to grow.  Those other weed types all had seeds too, and a lot of that seed got put into the ground, and some even flourished.
     I was working at Ronzos Pizza on Miramar Parkway, across from Harrys Miramar TV.   I was friends with all the guys at Ronzos, and Harrys Miramar TV, and even a bunch of the Miramar cops, and I had also gotten a few of my high school friends jobs there delivering pizzas, or making pies.  One of my high school buds was named Don Thomann, who had been a pretty straight arrow until he was corrupted by the personnel at Ronzos, as many of us were.  Thank you Ronzos pizza, for all the good food, and the education.  That place was a rite of passage for more than just a few of us, thats for sure.  Welcome to the real world.
    One night I was making pizzas and Don comes in, says hey Bill, Denise and Bernadette (Bern was Dons future wife) are out front in a big clunker cadillac with some other chicks and they are all stoned as shit.  Denise wants you to come out.  So of course I went, learning the first of the ropes right away.  Yes dear.
     Sure enough they were all stoned as the bejesus, and later I found out it was pot that Denises close friend Dawn, the driver of the gnarly caddy, had grown.  I was impressed, but little did I know, little did I know.  The girls were sent on their way with a big half pepp half sausage w/extra cheese, on the house, and everything was cool.
     About a month later I was conscripted by Dawns mother, through Dawn and Denise, to do some handyman work at their house off Pembroke Road near the turnpike.  I completed the shelving with no problems, and the girls were so happy they went out to buy beer, and we had a couple.  I had been paid in cash and it was more than I asked for, so I was kind of antsy to track down a bag, which at that time was 3-4 fingers for 25 bux.  25 bux was a lot more money then.
     The girls could tell I was distracted, and I told them I wanted to go get some pot.   Thats when I heard the story of the weed that Dawn grew.
     Dawns father was like a lot of guys in Miramar, and in the USA, he was a successful jackass par excellence, pompous, pig headed, and he got a lot of his lines from Archie Bunker.  He was always harping about marijuana, putting it down.  He said he would know it anywhere and would call the cops immediately blah dee dee blah. 
     Now Dawn and her mother had a great relationship, honest, open, and Dawn told her mother she would like to plant a marijuana seed on the back porch by the pool, in one of the big pots there.  Her mother thought it was a gas, so they did, and it grew into a plant about three feet high.  Dawn asked me if I wanted to see the picture they had taken of her father happily watering the marijuana plant on his back porch.  I said no thanks, mostly because I was embarassed for the poor jackass, having been one before myself.  And I had no doubts as to the veracity of this tale, none whatsoever.
    So yeah, by this early time I was wary of Jackassville at all levels, though obviously nowhere near wary ENOUGH, when all is seen in retrospect, but that is a story for another day.  I have to confess that this incident with Dawn and Denise and Dawns Mother allowed me a somewhat clear look into the female psyche, at least moreso than anything else that had happened up until then. 
     Because I was to be married I took that lesson to heart, and coupled with what I had learned on my own, and what the Italian barber in Miramar gladly told anyone who would listen, God bless his soul, I was able to survive 10 years with the first wife, though the last three were off and on, mostly off.  Over time I saw quite a lot more concerning the innner workings of the female mind, in general I mean, as I was married TWICE and have had my share of other relationships which never made it for one reason or another.   My ultimate pronouncement is that men and women formed as differently as possible to cover more survival aspects within reality.  Really one organism, two for the price of.  The God force is both male and female as One, hows THAT for scary, hmmmmm???   Most times men and women are not so different that they will kill each other before having children though.
     Help I'm rambling and I can't get up. 
     Anyway.
     Dawn said her patio marijuana plant had produced flowers, and at that time I was ignorant of what that meant, then I put it together: those were buds!  She said they had smoked only the leaf of the plant, and were afraid to smoke the flowers because they looked strange.  They WERE strange too; it was a lone female and had not been fertilized, it were non seed, it were. The women had accidentally produced sinsemilla, seedless flowers of marijuana hemp.
     It would be half a decade or more before I even heard the word Sinsemilla, but I was not afraid to try those flowers, oh no, so Dawn went to the garage and brought out a little flower pot just chock full of flower pot.  It made all the other marijuana I had smoked pale in comparison, and was almost scary that first time.  There was less than ounce of that flower material but they gave it to me with their blessings, and it was the best bonus I ever got.
     Sometime during the earliest eighties I obtained The Marijuana Growers Guide, and began producing small crops of sinsemilla with lights, and I was on my way.  The rest of the world has caught on and Sinse has become the most prevalent product in a big way, though some chowderheads in Mexico (2018) still don't get it.  Not only is their pot still seeded, but compressed so badly that the seeds are ruptured, releasing oils into the marijuana which can produce poison on burning.  Perhaps this is being done on purpose, the drug war being a cartel and religious war on Americans, don't you know?  One more good reason to grow your own seedless hemp flowers.
   
     

Bibliography
USDA Yearbook 1913, 50+ pages on growing all kinds of hemp
The Marijuana Growers Guide, Frank
The Emperor Wears No Clothes, Herer